Being a parent is hard enough without having to make tough decisions for yourself and your family. But sometimes as parents, we forget that the decisions we make can not only affect ourselves but our children as well. So in this contributed post, we are going to talk about the five hardest decisions parents make that somehow affect their child’s future.
These are decisions that we sometimes are stuck having to make but we may not always think about the consequences.
Parenting is challenging, to say the least. From the moment your child is born, you are faced with difficult decisions, such as whether to breastfeed or not, or go back to work or become a stay-at-home parent. As kids grow, the number of difficult decisions will increase. Below you will find a list of some of the hardest decisions you will have to face regarding your child’s future.
1. Moving House
Children feel happy and secure in an organized and safe home. Every move will have a psychological impact on them. Moving too often can make them insecure, even if it is necessary. Moving is just as stressful for kids as it is for adults, so you should always consider their needs and preferences. Find out about the schools and activities nearby, let them get used to the idea of moving and saying goodbye to their old friends, to reduce the negative impact of moving house.
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Many people stay in a relationship for the kids’ sake. However, when there is no hope, and arguments are regular, your kids will feel the strain and could develop anxiety as a result. You might actually protect them better if you leave than if you stay and expose them to a negative environment.
3. Letting Go
As kids grow older, they will demand more independence. You cannot expect them to stay with you until they are 40. Sometimes you have to let them experience life and make their own mistakes. If you have a hard to handle teenager, sometimes the only way out is letting them go and live with a family member. Another great option for struggling parents to improve their relationship with their teenager and give them space is finding a private boarding school where they can discover their talent and true calling, and focus on their studies, getting a better perspective of family life.
4. Withdrawing Financial Support
No matter how much you care about your kids, you cannot provide for them forever. You do them a favor if you encourage them to make their own way in life. Help them find a part-time job at an early age, and support them, but don’t give them money for nothing. If they want a car, make it clear that they need to get a job to pay for the insurance and fuel.
5. Career Choices
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While your child might change his mind about their career, you should be helping them with guidance. No matter if you don’t agree with their choice; stand by them and give them advice and support. You simply cannot force your kids to become who you always wanted to be, or they will start rebelling sooner or later.
Raising happy and healthy kids is a challenge for all parents. Learn how to handle difficult situations and treat your kids as partners. Reduce the negative impact of life events on their wellbeing, and encourage them to become independent in making their decisions and building their own lives.
Being a parent is a scary thing because one bad decision can affect your child for the rest of their life. We may not think about our actions as a parent in the long run or we may even think we are doing what is best for our family but it is always important to think about how your decision may affect your child.
Not every situation will be avoidable but it is best to try to come out of the situation in a way that helps make the child feel as safe and secure as possible. Sometimes we can get wrapped up in our own emotions and forget about how others are affected but we are responsible for the emotional stability of our children.
Listen to your child and find out what they fear and what makes them feel safe. Allow them to ask questions and when you don’t know the answer it is okay to let them know that. Children learn how to trust first from you so help them to feel safe and help them understand. Never leave them wondering.
Parenting is difficult and making decisions will be even more difficult. Just remember that your child will have to make decisions on their own one day, so try to behave in a way you want your child to emulate. We all want the best for our kids and the best way to do this is by setting a good example and being aware of how your actions affect them.
Have you had to make a difficult decision that you think has affected your child? Can you think of any other difficult decisions, not on this list? Please feel free to comment below!